The Courage to be Free: She hated me

I wanted to piggie back off my previous post.  When I was pondering on things I wanted to be freed from, not only did I think of other’s people opinions when it came to my success, it was also being free from worrying about people hating me in general.  I thought about a time when I experienced someone hating me who had never even met me and figured I would share that story as well.

So, a few years ago, I remember an incident where a person was being treated unfairly because of their friendship with me.  Mind you, the person who was doing the mistreating of my friend didn’t even know me.  As a matter of fact, she had never even met me.  To this day, I really have no clue who she is or why she chose to have an issue with me.  All I remember is being told she “hated” me despite never even knowing anything about me.  The only connection we had was we worked for the same employer, and she was the supervisor who came after me when I left to come work at my current employer.

I remember how, at first, it bothered me so bad because I was like, who is this person?  Why does she not like me? Did someone tell her something negative about me?  I couldn’t fathom how anyone could hold any animosity towards me (especially for no apparent reason). That is just plain silly, but truth of the matter is, it is possible. Then I thought about it, and I prayed on it because I was bothered by the fact that someone would actually hate me. I realized, “Alesha, not everyone is going to like you…and that is ok.” I have to admit that it was hard to digest because I know my heart and I know that to know me is to love me. I am far from perfect, but I never mean any ill will towards anyone. I will never intentionally do wrong to anyone because my heart/guilt wouldn’t take it.  That very same thing is what helped me to accept the fact that not everyone will like me.  I cannot help it if someone does not take the opportunity to get to know me. As a matter of fact, it is their lost and I kind of feel sorry for them. Not because they don’t like me but because it must be hard to walk around with the spirit of “hate” in your heart.  It has to be tormenting and draining. That is not a life I would like to live. 

I remember having to dig deep and really do some thinking. I started to think of the many times I had interacted with people and how I would experience this weird vibe or there was just something “not connecting.” I also thought about how I have done nothing to give reason for someone to “hate” me or dislike me, yet they do!!!  This is what I came up with…there is a spirit instilled in each and every one of us. In my opinion, it is a God-given spirit.  This spirit alerts us of who is “like us” and “not like us.” What I mean by this is there is the law of attraction. You attract like-minded people. At times when I was not “cliquing” with certain people or just found myself receiving weird vibes from people, mostly likely it was because our spirits were not connected, there was no compatibility…something was conflicting. Often times this is how I knew who I trusted and who I did not.  Often people I didn’t trust were the very same people I had to work with and/or answer to. Imagine sitting in meetings with people whose heart/spirit was not like yours but having to bear it and maintain your joy. It can be difficult, but if you have the spirit of God, it is possible!! What you have to realize is when you have the spirit of God in you, people who do not have the same, cannot handle that. They see a light in you, and sometimes attempt to plot ways to dim it.  Oftentimes, people have told me, they cannot read me. They do not know what I am thinking because I always have the poker face. Usually, these people do not take a liking to me simply because they don’t get me.  What folks don’t understand is this is my God-given shield. This is my protection from those who have unlike spirits. Those who plot to kill, steal, and destroy.  So most likely, if you are not taking a liking to me, it is probably because you mean no good for me, and most likely it is God protecting me from the likes of you.

This was a lesson I had to learn years ago, but still stands today.  Although it sucks that there will be folks out there who don’t like you or even hate you…it’s ok!!! It is not always a bad thing. It is a reflection of them not you. I remember reading something years back that says people’s perception of you is really a reflection of themselves. (You know what, that may have been something I said in a group I used to teach…I don’t know, I heard it somewhere). Anyway, rest assured that you are an awesome individual!! You are a child of the Most High God who has ways of protecting you from the enemy…sometimes that protection comes in the form of people not liking you. So don’t be sad or hurt…just lift your hands in the air and shout, “THANK YOU, JESUS!!!!!” …and keep it moving!!…Won’t He do it!! Let the church say, “Amen!!!”  


****….If God be for us, who can be against us? ~Romans 8:31(KJV)

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